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  • Writer's pictureHeather Hartman

10 Ways To Build Your Confidence and Be Seen As The Badass You Really Are!

Use this simple guide as a reminder of the super easy things you can do to get centered in YOUR truth, and draw out your inner badass.

1. Do a thorough inventory of the people in your life

...go through your relationships and journal out where there are people who resist what you do, or don’t support and fully encourage your ideas. If you’ve got a bunch of Debbie Downers in your immediate circle, it’s REALLY tough to break out of the cycle of continuing to hold YOURSELF back in your goals & dreams. Spend MORE time around the people who lift you up and edify you like nobody’s biz!

2. Positive Self-talk

...create your own personal mantras or affirmations and repeat them over and over to yourself in the mirror when you wake up and just before you go to bed. Make sure you’re looking INTO YOUR EYES. Yes, I know. It’s uncomfortable af. Guess HOW I know that? Cuz I did it. Lol yep! I still have a sticky note on my bathroom mirror that says “I love you, I’m so grateful that I get to be you today, and I got ya back babe! You can do ANYTHING!” Another option is you can do is download an app called ThinkUp, where you can record your affirmations in your own voice and the app will put music to your mantras and you can play them on loop while you do other things in your daily routine!

3. Try something new!

...I know this may seem silly, but one reason why we get so stuck in a rut (especially with our own confidence) is because we’re STUCK IN A FKN RUT! Lol literally! We haven’t tried anything new, so we’re basically “learning” that trying new things is scary and unsafe! BUT when you do something new and unfamiliar and you DON’T die, it’s a total confidence booster!

4. Consciously release others’ opinions of you

...What other people think of you my love, is none of your business. Period. No exceptions. No excuses. Give NO fks. Seriously. I’m not saying that you can’t care, but you absolutely cannot allow OTHER PEOPLE’s opinions to DICTATE who you are. Or how worthy you are for that matter. The first step in taking personal responsibility is realizing that ONLY YOU have control of ONLY YOU. And that is inversely true as well. Even if you literally have to repeat this (or something like it) mentally over and over again, “What others think of me is none of my business.” And “It’s safe and acceptable for me to just be me.”

5. Notice when resistance comes up for you

...this is an awareness practice that should be implemented daily. When you feel resistance, you know what I’m talkin’ bout, that feeling that makes your gut tighten up, and your shoulders tense, or maybe your butthole puckers & you crinkle your nose up (that be me…lol) or your whole body might become rock hard and you feel heavy af physically AND emotionally! Ugh! Whatever resistance might look like for you, simply notice it and ask yourself WHO you would be without that resistance? Ask yourself, what might you accomplish if just this one time, you didn’t allow that resistance to STOP you from doing whatever it is that you’re afraid of doing.

6. Change your physiology

...Okay, this might seem like a total “duh” moment, but we forget all too quickly HOW POWERFUL it is to change our physical state. My personal fave is dancing, but if you’re not a dancer, you might jump up and down. Maybe you have a jump rope! You may just go on a walk. Maybe you just punch the air above you for a minute or two. The point is to get your blood pumping, get your body moving, your muscles warm! This releases endorphins and dopamine. Dopamine is a hormone that motivates us to take ACTION on our goals! (P.S. #lifehack - Lavender essential oil has been linked to increasing endorphins.) So you see, our physiology has a direct impact on our psyche. Line dancing, swimming, running, even simply twirling around in a circle. Shoot, if Tony Robbins can have people jumping up and down like stark raving lunatics and pumping their fists in the air, and it works for them, then it must be good shit! Change yo state baby!

7. Practice releasing techniques of my favorite things to do is to ritualistically release shit that no longer serves me. Write down a list of gripes you have, with yourself, ways that you’re angry with yourself, or haven’t forgiven yourself, or are bitter about the ways that you’re showing up (or NOT showing up) in your life, and then burn that shit. Let it go! Let all the things that DO NOT SERVE your highest good, be them thoughts, beliefs, past experiences, punishments you’re still inflicting onto yourself for something that happened years ago or even decades ago. Release it all. And do it over and over again. Bc let’s get honest, some of that crap takes a long time to get rid of. #amiright?

8. ONLY wear clothes that make you feel AMAZING

...truth. Listen, it’s normal for women’s physical composition to change over time, and we need to stop trying to change our bodies bc they’re perfect exactly as they are. This is critical, and I think we tend to miss this a lot, especially as women. Your clothes should fit ONTO you, not the other way around. We don’t need to fit INTO clothes that don’t feel good, or don’t make us look in the mirror and go “Oww! Tssss, HOT!” And BTW, even if you don’t actually FEEL that way about yourself, say that shit to your reflection ANY-fk-WAY! That’s an order! Lol Basically, the moral of the story here is we need to love ourselves where we are right now. We need to be grateful for how hard we are on our bodies, these meat sacks put up with a lot of shit from us, especially as women! Send that beautiful hard-working body love, and put clothes on it that you LOVE and ALWAYS want to be seen in!

9. Do the damn thang

...ok. So here’s the deal. It’s going to feel scary no matter what. Until you do the damn thang. And then you do it again, and again, and with enough repetition, you’re a fkn expert! That’s how it works! Repetition of the basics will get you farther than anything else. Ever. So whatever that scary thing is, going on a date, dancing like no one’s watching, speaking up & using your voice to actually say what you need, going Live on social media, having photos taken of yourself, WHATEVER it is for you that legit scares the piss out of you…. Ya gotta do it. My best recommendation is to find a buddy that you can be accountable to. Have a gal pal that you can celebrate with when you do your brave scary shit. And hold each other accountable. For whatever! For all the things. There’s power in numbers. I have several accountability partners and groups. It’s safe for me to be honest with them about my fears, my doubts or my failures, and my need to shift my perspective on things!

10. Connect to your inner wisdom

...This could mean so many different things, but for the purpose of this article it means: lady, you have all the answers within. You need to remember that you are powerful, capable and intelligent beyond measure. Do whatever you have to do to connect to the Wise Woman that lives within you. Meditate. Breathe. Put your hands over your heart and ask! Go into nature. Levitate. I don’t care. But you have a MASSIVELY dynamic and mighty sense of inner wisdom. Every woman has this. Tap into that shit! Your intuition will never steer you wrong. Ever.

If you're looking for support in finding your badass confidence, want to grow or scale your business, or desire to develop your own personal visibility strategy - book a free chat with me, let's explore how working together can help you uplevel!

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